Diaries of a Black-Yard Worker

Posted in Uncategorized on June 4, 2010 by shammieg

Yes, the pun was intended.

As you all know, I’ve recently gotten a job. Because this job has so much freedom, and is unusually cool compared to most summer jobs, I decided that I’d upload a weekly video log of what I’m doing out in the bush 40 hours a week.

Unfortunately I forgot to charge by battery before work this morning so this episode is pretty short.



Employment Dance

Posted in Uncategorized on May 30, 2010 by shammieg

The road to employment is long and treacherous in the town of Whitby. In the past few weeks I’ve been to every mall’s website in the area looking for vacancies. I’ve driven around town dropping resumes off at stores who’s ‘Help Wanted’ signs have been up since I was in grade 9. I’ve pretty much lived on Jobbank.ca where there are supposed to be a ton of jobs posted that are available only to poor students.

I mean I had pretty much done it all until I remembered that Kijiji sometimes has job postings for all the major areas in Ontario. Times being as hard as they are I figured I had no reason not to check it out. Amidst the 100 posts looking for nannies and sitters I found a link looking for a student to do some “yard work” so I sent in my resume.

A week later I was interviewed and offered the job… If you can even call it one.

My duties include:
– Riding a lawn tractor around a rich guy’s 13 acre lot
– Feeding his donkeys
– Cleaning up fallen branches, brush etc
– Paddling his boat up the river to ensure neighbours aren’t dumping garbage on his property
– Chilling at his antique car shop doing odd jobs

So basically my job is to listen to my iPod and dance all day. Can’t complain….

Actually, I can complain because I know that after one week of this I am going to be darker than dude from 300!

About To Make A REMIX~

Posted in Uncategorized on May 23, 2010 by shammieg

Coming SOON!

Super Cali*fornication*

Posted in Uncategorized on May 16, 2010 by shammieg

As much as I’ve been wanting something to occupy my time this summer it’s safe to say that school work will never suffice. I don’t know why I was so excited to be starting summer courses a few weeks ago when I should have been appreciating the fact that I had no job or commitments.

I still have no job but now have 3 courses to worry about constantly and just can’t seem to get myself around to doing it. Everything else just because so much more interesting when you have work that needs to be done. There is no other time that I feel the need to clean my car, or alphabetize all 5 Xbox games that I do own, or see how long I can do a handstand, or try to sing the lyrics of songs backwards…

Eventually I run out of ideas and end up back in bed watching Californication which after completing season one today has inspired me. Anyone who has seen the show is probably assuming that I was inspired to fornicate with as many women as possible in which case you are absolutely

WRONG. It has inspired me to become a writer (of what I don’t know). A friend who I won’t name has already shot the idea down saying

“i dont think you should be an author..
you dont even keep up your blog…..
i dont think you would finish a book. . . . .”

And she’s probably right, but who knows. I just know that I would enjoy the feeling of writing something and if I even have 12 copies of it produced and hidden deep in a library somewhere I’d be immortal.

That is all, no funnies today.

Swagger Jackin’

Posted in Uncategorized on May 7, 2010 by shammieg

So it wasn’t me who found this, but whatever. Enjoy!

Black Cards Black Cars

Posted in Spoken! on April 30, 2010 by shammieg

I was in the grocery store earlier today when I had the great idea to let the rest of the internet in on a cool secret act I perform on the regular to make myself feel better.

As everybody already knows (from my amazing subtitle) I’m broke. I should probably edit it though seeing as I’m not so infamous these days considering the increase in status that my blog has enabled me to achieve. Anyway, the bottom line is that student life has me, like everyone else, living a life stricken by poverty and shortcomings.

Unfortunately for me OSAP (student assistance for those unaware) doesn’t give me too much to work with. I have a few friends who get enough to buy cars and live in amazing apartments, purchase flat screen televisions and even exotic dancers for parties TRUE STORY among other things.

And then there are people like myself who don’t even get enough for the important things. It would be great if I even got enough to cover my entire tuition for once. But that’s neither here nor there!

So anyway, like most broke people I figured the best thing to do would be to get a credit card. But not just any credit card.. This time I made sure it was from a different bank so that I wouldn’t have to see the balance everyday when I log into online banking and having it hinder my mood.

Now because I have no income it’s a pretty big deal when I get that $62 GST cheque from the government in the mail. It boosts my confidence to wake up and see that $62 still looking back at me. So days like today when I go to buy that 99 cent can of Arizona and I think to myself

“Yeah, I can pay for this with my debit card”

Then I immediately think

“Hold up, I can pay for this with my credit card and it’s like I’m not losing money at all”

This way you still feel like you have money in you account even though you know that at the end of the month you’re not going to have it. At least this gives you the satisfaction of being in control and the illusion of having money for a 4-week period!

Genius? I know!

Tip: I advise getting a card with an extremely low limit ’cause times get hard

One Summer Dream

Posted in Random on April 29, 2010 by shammieg

It’s now late April and I think it is safe to say that most people are finished with exams and are either back home or staying at school to work and pursue great employment opportunities..

Although it probably isn’t the same for everyone, I know that last September shortly after receiving my first assignment I couldn’t wait for Christmas break. As always it came ever so quickly and I was thrust into the dreadful winter semester.

It’s funny how when school is going on everyone has 10,000 plans for the summer. The closer summer gets, the more great things we talk about doing and the more anxious we are to finish exams and finally be free, which I guess is all good at the time.

But I don’t know.. Somehow I feel like the novelty of the summer months wore off somewhere between grades 8 and 12. I mean, after I wrote my last exam last week I felt untouchable for an hour or so before experiencing the same degree of boredom that I’ve felt every summer since grade 12. So much so that the highlight of my first few days of summer was receiving my Distance Ed textbooks in the mail today. That’s not to say I’m going to open any of the books anytime soon, I’m not that bored……………………………………..yet.

At the end of the day I’d take this extreme sense of boredom over working in the back of an 18-wheeler at LCBO again.

I hear you, bro

Someone drop a comment for me to read or something.